Throughout our lives, we are shaped by the people, events, and values by which we are surrounded. We translate how we are raised through the lens of our cognitive and emotional filters.
We figure out, if we are lucky, who we want to be and how we want to show up through the different experiences that are a part of our lives. If we work at it, we can identify a core by which we are grounded and guided through the ever-changing and, at times, unpredictable world.
Knowing our core is essential, especially through parenting and co-parenting.
At Solutions Parenting Supports, one concept we focus on with all families is to identify, regardless of the state of the whole family, what the parenting position is.
A parenting position is: what do you want to take a stand on and why? What boundaries are so important that they are ”non-negotiable” and, if crossed by a child, you would see it as an indicator that a higher level of support and care is necessary, perhaps even turning to wilderness therapy or residential treatment?
Based on each parent’s individual knowledge, experience and values, this stance can be identified and a middle ground can be reached if parents find that they are at opposite ends on some issues.
This video clip from the recent Strengthen Your Family Workshop, guides parents through an example of an anchored parenting stance, as well as, concepts to help co-parents work together to find a middle ground.